2013 – The Summer Wacky Events Calendar

Fed up with the same old weekends. Need something fun and very different. Want to inject some real excitement into your life? Look no further then. Below is our own list of where to go and what to do in 2013. This may sound like hyperbole, but there is a good chance that some of these events will be life-changing. Others will leave you with a long lasting adrenalin rush and others, well, will just leave you humiliated, exhausted, disgraced, muddy, happy, ecstatic, over the moon etc….

Here we go with our own top 11 but there are another 100 or so too!

World Mountain Bike Chariot Racing Championships

Sunday 26 May – LLanwrtyd Wells, Powys

Woolsack Racing

Monday 27 May – Tetbury, Gloucestershire

Shin Kicking

Friday 31 May – Chipping Campden, Gloucestershire

World Worm Charming Championships

Saturday 22 June – Willaston, nr Nantwich, Cheshire

World Egg Throwing Championships

Sunday 30 June – Swaton

Oxenhope Straw Race

Sunday 7 July – Oxenhope, Haworth, Yorkshire

World Snail Racing Championships

Saturday 20 July – Congham, Norfolk

World Hen Racing Championships

Saturday 3 August – Barley Mow, Bonsall, Derbyshire

UK Backward Run

Sunday 11 August – Heaton Park, Manchester

World Bog Snorkelling Championships

Monday 28 August – LLanwrtyd Wells, Powys

World Stone Skimming Championships

Sunday 29 September – Easdale Is, nr Oban, Scotland

Please remember if you enter any of these events that we will be held responsible for any laughing you may incur. Life is not a rehearsal, so enjoy the mad, the crazy and the downright idiotic.

Wacky season getting close

Very soon, every weekend until November will see at least one crazy event. Some weekends will have two or even three mad sports or contests. More news on these very soon including our very own top ten for 2013. Fancy a spot of Shin Kicking?

For the moment why not look forward to the relatively sedate sport of sheep racing. It’s the Grand National this Saturday, but for those who like their animal sport to be on the safe side then why not trot along to the The Big Sheep near Bideford in North Devon. Expect false start! Get there by 3pm to check out the entries.

It’s never too late to become a champion

01/04 There’s the London Olympics and the Paralympics. For the less faint hearted there is the Cotswold Olympics and for the brave and daring there is the Drag Olympics. But it’s about time that the old and creaking were given a ‘last’ chance of success or even movement with something else to talk about other than the granny tax. Wacky Nation are pleased to announce the 1st OAPlympics with the slogan, ‘Slow, slow, slow’! Click here for more details

Official OAPlympics rules

Location: Drovers Mill, Devon
Date: June 31st 2013
 

Wacky Nation to tackle the Endurance Race at the  
2013 UK Cold Water Swimming Championships

You would have thought (and i would have hoped) that a skinny guy with less fat than a cracker would choose something less life threatening than cold water swimming for a passion. Sadly, not but at least it’s relatively normal compared to Bog Snorkelling and Clog Cobbing. I have been cold water swimming for over ten years in rivers, lakes and seas, with only a pair of red speedoes and a yellow hat for coverage. I have even swum in deep puddles and flood waters to satisfy my craving. I have been chased by wardens, had my clothes pinched by kids and suffered injuries resulting from collisions with floating debris. But, we’re not Wacky Nation for nothing!

The benefits of cold water swimming are surprisingly numerous and i can personally vouch for the effect it has had on my immune system. But it is the endorphins and the over-whelming sense of achievement which largely explain my irrational dedication to a sport that i was definitely not intended for.

Well, in late January i have the opportunity to demonstrate my prowess in the cold water when i tackle 450 metres of Tooting Bec Lido. The water will be around 4 or 5 degrees and the only concession to the swimmers is a hat. The sillier the better. Thankfully the race will only take 8 or 9 minutes, provided my hands don’t freeze to the side of the pool. On the plus side, there are hot tubs and saunas afterwards.

Come along to Tooting Bec Lido in South London on Saturday 26th January to see me and around 40 other foolhardy idiots tackle the race. Earlier in the day there are shorter races across one width of the lido for swimmers with less propensity for pain and misery.

Have a Wacky Christmas and even madder New Year

Merry Christmas from the Wacky Nation Team

The festive season doesn’t always have to involve watching endless television repeats and braving the Boxing Day sales. Well, it doesn’t for us anyway. Why not spice up your own Christmas this year and instead head to one of many wacky events taking place. This is by no means a definitive list, but arguably some of the best.

Christmas Day

Festive swims and dips

Come on in, the waters lovely…honest. More insane than wacky, but to work up appetite on Christmas Day why not try one of the many more festive sea swims, plunges or toe dips. Our favourite is at Budleigh Salterton in Devon, which starts at 10am and usually ends at 10.01am. Other well-known festive swims can be found (or lost!) at Hunstanton, Tenby, Porthcawl, Exmouth (starts at 11am which allows those who did Budleigh a second festive swim of the day!), Lowestoft, Brighton and Weymouth. Head to the outdoor swimming society (click above) for more ideas.

Boxing Day (so many choices!)
Swimbridge Wheel barrow race and ‘aquatic’ Tug-of-War. Formerly the wheelie bin race until the local residents complained. Head to the Jack Russell pub in Swimbridge in North Devon if you can.

Grantchester Barrel Rolling, Cambridgeshire. From Midday. Going back to the 1960′s there is a race involving four town teams then a county championship involving three teams of outsiders. The races are the highlight (unless you prefer beer to barrel racing) of a 3 day beer festival.

Matlock Raft Race, Derbyshire. There are raft races and then there is the Matlock Raft Race, a challenging four-mile course along the River Derwent and arguably the crème de la crème of daft boat contests. Right from the off, expect plenty of action as teams on faster, streamlined rafts paddle furiously to be the first to finish. Whilst the fun, less sturdy entries (if they can stay afloat) compensate for their lack of speed with impromptu entertainment, exchanging flour bombs and firing water cannons at unsuspecting spectators as they drift downstream.

Haslemere Boxing Day Run

A 3.5 mile run with a pint of winter ale halfway. Not exactly wacky, but certainly an uplifting way to spend Boxing Day.

Pagham Pram Race

First run in 1946 and still going strong. Pagham, near Bognor Regis.

Windlesham Pram Race

A 3.5 mile race via the local pubs for charity. Windlesham, Surrey.

Bakers and Sweeps Flour and Soot Football Massacre, Waltham Cross, Herts. Blind goalkeepers, alcoholic drinks at half time for the players and moving goalposts – football doesn’t get much better than this. For a few seconds at least, there is a semblance of normality, with wayward tackles, speculative punts up field and abuse dished out at the referee, who unwisely dresses as Santa Claus. It doesn’t take long though for the game to live up to its name, with aerial bombardments of flour and soot along with other crazy antics such as cling-filming the opposition’s goal. To maintain the high tempo of chaos throughout, there are 12 official rules, including, ‘anybody concealing the ball will be classed as the ball and treated in the same manner!’ and ‘only 40 players maximum per side.’ The highlight is the match ball, which gradually increases in size, from a rugby ball to a very awkward space hopper, until the climax, when a seven-foot inflatable ball enters the foray. You have to see it to believe it. See the You Tube clip, left.

Fishermen & Firemens Boxing day football match

The usual football fare will be on display: fancy dress, beer at half time, plenty of play acting and compulsory dips in the sea for the losers at the end. Then it’s the raft race. South Bay Beach, Scarborough

Thursday 27th December
World Maggot Racing Championships (plus the legendary maggot mountain) Beartown Tap pub, Congleton, Cheshire. If you like maggots head to Congleton for a whole night of maggot entertainment. The current world record for the 18 inch maggot sprint is 1 minute 48 seconds. Can your maggot do any better?

New Years Eve
Stonehaven Fireballs, Scotland. If you have a burning desire to experience a spectacular Hogmanay tradition, then head to Stonehaven where the locals banish the evil spirits and welcome in the New Year with an awe-inspiring display of fireball swinging. The fireballs, about forty in total, are homemade devices made from flammable material such as wood, coal, old cloths and pinecones (plus the odd secret ingredient), then soaked in paraffin and strapped inside a mesh of chicken wire. Just before midnight, the fireballs are set alight, and with the aid of a long metal handle, the swingers proceed to walk up and down one of the town’s main streets whilst swinging their spherical conflagration around their body.

HAPPY NEW YEAR
Mapleton Bridge Jump, nr Ashbourne, Derbyshire. How’s this for the ultimate hang over cure. Teams of two compete in an alternative triathlon involving a short raft race, a bridge jump and a quick sprint. But it is the middle discipline that brings out spectators in their hoards and leaves competitors trembling with fear. After surviving the weir and minor turbulence in the river, the teams race to the bridge and proceed one by one to jump off lemming-like, plummeting 30 foot into a pool of freezing river water. Most competitors make the jump the instant their feet touch the top of the bridge, though it’s not unknown for some to over-linger, dwelling on their impending doom before either jumping anyway or backing out to a chorus of boos. After the jump and safe, swift exit from the river, there is a brisk run across fields to the village pub. Competitors may now be shivering from head to foot, but are strangely no longer suffering from a throbbing headache.

Blue Boar Bathtub race, Poole Quay, Poole. From 10.30am

The Loony Dook, South Queensferry, nr Edinburgh

Sunday 6th January
Haxey Hood, Lincolnshire. Warm clothes and flask of whiskey essential. If you take part, take care!!!

Please check before travelling to any of these events as adverse weather or unforeseen circumstances can lead to their abandonment. Also coming up in January the legenday Chariot race and Toga Party and the coldest 450 metres of the year. More to come.

First Ever All-Women UK Rock Paper Scissors Championships Final

Over 200 contestants met last night at the Penderel’s Oak for some fierce competitive play.

After winning their way through 6 rounds and beating 126 other contestants, (including 80 men) the final was a spectacular all-female contest between Amy ‘Eric Cartman’ Rowe & Miranda ‘Thunder & Lightning’ Kane. In a thrilling best of five, Amy Rowe eventually came out the victorious winner & first female UK Champion.

Main Contest
Winner – Amy Rowe
Second – Miranda Rowe
Third – Katie Goldwater
Fourth – Simon Martin

Challenge RPS Winner
Winner – Alex Minnie with a massive accumulation of £293 of street money

Semi Finalists in Individual Contest
David Brewis vs Simon ‘Martinez’ Martin
Miranda ‘Thunder & Lightning’ Kane vs Thomas ‘The Melonator’ Haslam
Amy ‘Eric Cartman’ Rowe vs Nathan ‘The Destroyer’ Sivyer
Katie Goldwater vs Dominque ‘Pete’ Franke

Well done Amy and thanks to everyone else who entered.
We’ll be back in 2013 with regional and national championships.

UK Rock Paper Scissor Championships

The 6th UK Rock Paper Scissors Championships are almost here. To help you prepare for the contest, we have compiled a list of tactics and tips to try out. Rock Paper Scissors is not just about luck although luck could also be considered a tactic if you’re winning.

1. You could move to Woking temporarily then move away again. Most people do! Most people also move back out again!
2. If you play against a bloke, throw paper as blokes are most likely to throw rocks. Although if you’re opponent has also read this, he’ll be thinking the same thing.
3. Women are less likely to throw a rock, so scissors against a women is always a safer bet
4. If you’re a puny looking guy, surprise your opponent and throw a ROCK.
5. Conversely, if you’re big and mean looking, throw a girlie scissors.
(of course, if you come up against a bloke who is big and mean, they may not throw rock, so scratch tip 2)
6. Cloaking. But make sure the ref doesn’t penalise you for a late throw.
7. Shadowing. Even more tricky to pull-off and possible yellow card if not done consummately
8. Employ the Urbanis Defence. Requires confidence and watch out for ineptitude in your opponent
9. Get drunk – you won’t have any idea what you’re playing next. Neither will your opponent!
10. The Crystal Ball. Tell your opponent what they’ll throw next and chances they do opposite i.e. ‘I bet you’re about to throw paper? So obvious!’
11. Spring load your scissors. But don’t play this often or it will become a visible tell
12. Random Play. Don’t think about it, just throw. Usually the same result if you follow tip 9.
13. Tattoos! Permenant or tempoary, whack the word ‘ROCK’ on your forehead or chest to influence your opponent. If tattoos just too extreme, use a head band or belt with the ROCK on it.
14. Throw counting. To deter your opponent from throw counting, pull funny faces at them or shout out random numbers.
15. Sicilian Reasoning. Don’t ask, it’s complicated
16. The barlow effect. Quick play to force rock from your opponent but the referee may penalise you
17. Bribe the referee with beer. But it has to be Stella.
18. Gambits! There are many well-known sequences of throws which are often used. The Avalance, The Bureaucrat and the Scissor Sandwich to name but three.
19. Gambits – part II. If your opponent has thrown PAPER and SCISSORS are they about to complete the Scissor Sandwich? Get to know all the gambits. Of course, they may be following tips 9 and 12. Most competitors end up following every tip at some point!

More tips to come

Location: Crosse Keys, London
Date: Saturday 13th October 2012.
 

World Wellington Boot Throwing Championships

The 3rd World Wellington Boot Throwing Championships (in Wellington, obviously) proved very popular, with both the male and female records smashed for the first time since 2009. Competition was very fierce in all age groups except the under 10′s where James B, won the bronze, silver and gold medal distances. Welly Done James! The event also involved entrants from Wellington, New Zealand and Ireland for a truly global event and there was even a throw co-ordinated with a Welly Boot contest taking place in Yorkshire.

 

World Alternative Games

Have you been inspired by the London Olympics? Do you want to become a champion and receive as much adoration as Jessica Ennis without the need for months of punishing training and adhering to a strict diet of rice cakes and energy drinks. Well look no futher because the smallest town in Britain is organising the maddest sporting occasion in the world. Right now. Over two weeks, there will be a mind boggling range of sports to try. If you thought the Olympics was too mainstream, then this will be up your bog.

Forget the 100 metres, why not enter the Corinthian Backward Running Race. Not enough muscle for Greco-Roman wrestling? Fear not, enter the Gravy Wrestling where the playing field is levelled, literally and figuratively speaking with Bisto. There’s also Rock Paper Scissors (Avalanche!!), Pooh Sticks, Wife Carrying (or ex-wife carrying should you drop her), Bog Snorkelling (in the home of Bog Snorkelling) and much more madness.

So just head for the mid Welsh town and enjoy day after day of wacky sports. Forget about the Lycra though. Just make sure you bring a sense of humour and the guts to try anything at all. Yes, that means even Ditch Racing. Whatever that is! No one is allowed to just watch. Don’t forget many of the events are covered in our book, Wacky Nation which includes tips on how to win or at least lose gracefully. Good Luck.

Location: Llanwrtyd Wells, Mid Wales. On the A483 between Llandovery and Builth Wells.
Date: From 17th August until 2nd September 2012.
 

Team Olimpik Rock Paper Scissors Championships

Thanks to the 150 competitors and spectators who turned out yesterday at the Knights Templar Pub to see which country was truely the World Champions in Team Olimpik Rock Paper Scissors.

Congratulation to Lapland A who won after a fierce rock paper scissors battle against the Vatican City, our worthy silver medalists. Great Britain fought against San Marino for the bronze medal slot and managed to bring a medal home for the host country.

We hope you all enjoyed it and look forward to seeing you at the UK Championships on 13th October at the Crosse Keys, London.

Coming up – Want to become a World Champion?

Bored with the football? Bored with Olympic talk? Or just bored of life? Well, why not sample something a lot different over the next few months. Here is just small selection of the madness you can experience in the UK:

World Egg Throwing Championships

Sunday 24 June – Swaton, nr Grantham, Lincolnshire.

Egg Throwing, Egg Trebuchet, Russian Egg Roulette, Egg Relay. Egg-cellent fun. If you don’t like eggs, i wouldn’t go!

World Sumo Suit Athletics Championships

Sunday 8 July – Battersea Park, London

Check out the video for a taster of what you could let yourself into. The idiot failing miserably in the long jump is me!

World Pea Shooting Championships

Saturday 14 July – Witcham, Cambridgeshire

Great fun unless you attempt to stuff all 5 peas in your mouth before shooting. Advice from the experts that should never be handed at to beginners.

World Toe-Wrestling Championships

Saturday 14 July – Bentley Brook Inn, Fenny Bentley, Derbyshire

Not all feet will get into the contest. Competitors receive an inspection off a resident nurse who will ban anyone showing signs of athlete’s foot or worse. They are the lucky ones. Once into the contest, some poor soul must take on ‘Nasty Nash’.

World Snail Racing Championships

Saturday 21 July – Congham, Norfolk

Ready, Steady, Slow… Will anyone beat the world record of 2 minutes set by Archie in 1995? One word of advice for would be entrants – avoid feeding your snail lettuce because it is a soporific.

Please check dates and times before leaving.

Please get in touch for a full listing of events over the summer in the UK and around the world. Also get in touch for tips and tactics to become a World Champion or remain in one piece.

 

It’s the Cotswold Olimpicks

Cheese Rolling not fast enough for you? Fancy a spot of tibia bashing instead for a far more brutal attempt at bodily harm. The Cotswold Olimpicks (yes, it is spelt correctly, otherwise Mr Seb may get irate) takes place on Dover’s hill and has been an annual fixture for 400 years. The Olimpicks incorporates running races and a team challenge. But it’s the Shin Kicking contest that brings the crowds flocking. As a twice-loser at this event I can vouch for the physical pain that is conjured up from the name. Luckily as a first round loser, I was actually the winner. As entrants progress through the event, the shins turn increasingly black and blue and the short sharp yelps becoming increasingly prevalent. In a nutshell, competitors wear funny looking white coats, grab each other by the lapel and attempt to kick their opponent’s shins. Barbaric? Yes! The aim is to floor their opponent twice in a best of three bout. Most competitors inevitably fall over in submission.

Tips:

1. Fortunately, there’s plenty of straw to stuff up your trouser legs for much needed protection, so don’t do what one fool did and turn up in a pair of shorts.
2. When your opponent attempts yet another bash of your shins, take a swipe at his standing leg
3. Don’t enter unless you consider your personality somewhere between stupid and very stupid

Check out the video for a taster. Don’t say you weren’t warned!

Location: Chipping Campden, Gloucestershire
Date: Friday 1 June
 

UK Backward Run

Turn your back on sport! 2 Days left to enter the UK’s only backward running race (see video of the month)

That’s what Wacky Nation are asking everyone to do on Sunday 27 May when the 3rd UK Backward Run hits scenic Heaton Park in Manchester. There will be a fun and serious race (Can you beat the course record of 7 minutes?) around a one mile course with only a slight hill. Don’t worry the course is car free and will be well marshalled to make sure no mishaps occur. Before anyone shouts out that backward running ‘is a daft to do’ or ‘isn’t that dangerous?’, the sport is actually loaded with benefits and not as risque as you think. In fact we have researched 100 reasons to try backward running and a few of these are listed here. We hope you only need one to enter:

Backward running burns a third more calories than forward running
Improves your hearing and peripheral vision
The exercise comes in handy when faced with an angry bull in a field or should you enter the Bull Run.
1 mile of backward running = 6 miles forwards in terms of effort.
Make you a better dancer
Got a bad back? Backward running or walking is one of the best ways to sort it out.
It’s the World Backward Running Championships in August. Start backward running now and you could be the world champion at 100 metres or 10K!
Think Cheese Rolling or Bog Snorkelling is Fun. Try this for laughs!

Enter now and you’ll never look forward again.

Location: Heaton Park, Manchester
Date: Sunday 27th May 2012
 

World Water Bombing Championships

Remember when you were told off by an irate lifeguard for water bombing into the shallow end of a swimming pool? Well, now you can do it in style without the verbal assault. The 8th World Water Bombing Champs hits Ponds Forge in Sheffield. Teams of four of any weight (higher the better), gender and size (bigger the better) are required to lauch themselves off the diving board and perform mid-air acrobatics before making a big splash. Judges will score each performance, just like in the Olympic Diving. For added incentive to enter, the event raises money for Macmillan Cancer Support and all competitors receive a free Pukka Pies and Peas supper…presumingly after everyone has dived! For a taster of what to expect see our video of the month.

Location: Ponds Forge, Sheffield
Date: Wednesday 2nd May 2012
 

Another Crazy Easter coming up

01/04 Easter is not just about eggs. Over the Easter weekend there are a plethora of crazy events to keep you occupied. The madness kicks off on Good Friday with the World Marbles in Tinsley Green, Sussex. Sounds tame? Well, my one and only appearance here ended with bleeding knuckles. On Sunday it’s the World Egg Rolling Championships in South Devon. The egg rolling is strictly for kids but always a great spectacle as the competitors inevitably take more of a tumble than the eggs. But it’s Easter Monday when the real excitement starts and if you plan your day carefully you could witness 3 wacky events. In the morning, Gawthorpe in West Yorkshire hosts the World Coal Carrying Championships. Strictly for the big guys and girls. Then in the afternoon head over the Pennines to take part in a spot of Clog Cobbing in Rawtenstall, Lancashire. Just don’t fling the clog into the river as you’ll have to fetch it yourself. I speak from experience. If you still have the energy, there is the often violent but very exhilarating tradition of Bottle Kicking (see video of the month) in Hallaton, Leicestershire. Stand well back for this one unless you want to suffer the same fate that befells the fences, hedges and other objects that get in the way of the game’s advance! I speak from yet another experience.
 

2012 OAPlympics

‘It’s never too late to become a champion’

01/04 There’s the London Olympics and the Paralympics. For the less faint hearted there is the Cotswold Olympics and for the brave and daring there is the Drag Olympics. But it’s about time that the old and creaking were given a ‘last’ chance of success or even movement with something else to talk about other than the granny tax. Wacky Nation are pleased to announce the 1st OAPlympics with the slogan, ‘Slow, slow, slow’! Click here for more details

Official OAPlympics rules

Location: Drovers Mill, Devon
Date: June 31st 2012
 

Team Olimpik Rock Paper Scissors Championships

Is your business or team looking for a fun summer sporting event to take part in?
The Wacky Nation Team are introducing a new rock paper scissors team event for this year and are now looking for 30 teams to take part. There are plenty of countries you can choose to represent, in fact there are still 194 Worldwide to select. The hardest part will be deciding which 4 people will be in your team at this prestigious sporting event.

More details can be found at Olimpik RPS.

Location: Knights Templar, Chancery Lane, London
Date: 8th August 2012
 

Yukigassen Snowball-fighting European Championship

The sport of snowball fighting hits Finland for the 17th time. But unlike your typical snowball fight, this contest has rules, a proper playing area and even a referee. In a knock-out format teams of six go head to head, each provided with 90 snowballs to launch at the opposition in three manic minutes. The idea (obviously) is to hit the opposition, which eliminates them from the game. Points are awarded for every player a team has on the pitch at the end.

Location: Kemijärvi, Finland
Date: 31st March to 1st April 2012
 

World Pooh Sticks Championships

In the spirit of Winnie-the-Pooh, individuals and teams race short twigs, aka Pooh sticks, over a distance of roughly twenty metres down the River Thames (before it gets too big). Disappointedly, entrants have pre-assigned spots on the bridge, precluding the necessity (and fun part) of a thorough examination of the river beforehand to determine the best spot. The sure fire way for success is to bear in mind the advice handed out to Tigger from Eeyore, the real expert, by ‘letting your stick drop in a twitchy sort of way, if you understand what I mean.’

Location: Days Lock, Little Wittenham, OX14 4RB
Date: Sunday 25th March, from 11am